October 2, 2011

What To Do

By Kaci Goodrich Uipi

So many choices...

We went and saw the IVF doctor again. I think we might go through with it... Or at least continue down this path until something stops us. There is still one big decision to make regarding IVF: To have twins, or not to have twins?

Now, I know there are no guarantees in life. Just because the doctor transfers 2 embryos, doesn't mean both will survive. Just because the doctor transfers only 1 embryo doesn't mean it won't split into 2. And of course, just because the doctor strategically places any embryos at all doesn't mean any of them will continue to grow into a healthy, normal baby.

However, it's up to me to give the number. 1 or 2? There seems to be too many risks involved with carrying twins that I ask myself, "Why in the world would I purposely put my babies in jeopardy?" But then there's the thought of only transferring 1 and it NOT surviving and thinking, "What an idiot! Why didn't we just go for 2 the first time around, and not have to worry about doing the whole thing over again!?" Of course, then there's the idea of having 2 babies NOW and not have to do the whole thing over again in a couple of years anyway.

Supposedly it's more money to have twins because you have to have 2 of everything at the SAME TIME: 2 cribs, 2 car seats, 2 carriers, 2 swings, etc.

There's so many things to think about, and I really don't know what to do. They say that the IVF process can make you mad, angry, and crazy. Well what does it do to people who are already crazy? Could I handle going through the process twice? Or the bigger question is: Could I handle being up all night with 2 babies crying at the exact same time??

On a different subject...What if we forgot the whole IVF thing and went with an egg donor instead?

Now THAT'S a question. What do you think?


  1. I wish I could give you advice. Trying for another baby is just terrifying, no matter what your circumstance, after having lost one to illness.

    If it was me, I'd go for 2.

    But that's between you, your husband, and the Lord.

  2. Oh the questions?!?! Sometimes I wish we had those questions to think about. Well we did for a bit, when we thought we knew what we were dealing with. Now it is a shot in the dark regardless it seems.
    I have told my hubs that if and when we try again if we had the same result as P that I would strongly consider an egg donor or embryo adoption.
    Although when we thought we could gene select we were fully planning on doing that. So I think both are good options. Wait, will you be gene, or gender selecting?
    The more I read about invitro and heard people stories the more angry it made me. Because I can get pregnant in a flash. It made me grumpy to think about going through all that when I could just do it on my own. I guess this is why I consider the others.
    Freak who knows what the heck to do...right?!?! Where do you guys live? I feel like we should be BF...LOL. Now I am just creepy. haha

  3. Just thinking about you and about how hard this time of year must be for you as you approach Joshua's birthday. I wish I had answers for you. It's such a weighty matter and you have been through so much already. Sending love and prayers your way.

  4. What? Your sisters write mean comments?? I like your new blog design.

    I have lots of thoughts on this matter, but I feel like it is your decision. Only you and Salesi can decide the best route to take. If you REALLY want to hear what I have to say, call me. I do have some thoughts, but you might not like them.

  5. This is a hard question to even imagine to have to be thinking about it. This is really up to you, your husband and the Lord. God knows what is best for your family if it is 2 babies or just 1. If it was me, I would personally go with 2 and just see what happens, and leaving it up to God and know he will do his wonderful work inside of your body. I hope you will feel your prayers answered on which way God wants you to go. Good luck on this new journey and I will keep on praying for you family!!!


I have never deleted anyone's comment. (Not even the mean ones from my sisters.)